Adaptation

I quit smoking about three weeks ago. It feels like an eternity and insanity all meshed together like my childhood thanksgiving dinner bites...I guess they're the same. I have been training and conditioning myself really aggresively to help achieve the goal of becoming a non-smoker. Funny thing is how much more difficult it makes everything. I want to train more today, but I cannot because I lack the endurance. Being clear across the country...not much to do. And this is the path to the dark side....this cynical line of thought.

I guess being alone for the time being with my girlfriend on a work assignment will help me. One simply cannot fall into the pattern of unknowingly using your relationship, your lover, as your sense of identity. In other words when you have no crutch to lean on, you have to figure something else out on your own. The ability to function independently is crucial for your health and well-being individually as well as in your relationship. Jealosy is a cruel master to live by.

I would know. Instead of cherishing the wonderful moments I have, I would be overwhelmed by paranoia and jealousy. This did nothing more than make us miserable. Don't do that. I'm incredibly lucky that I have a lady who overlooks that and see's me for me. I'm not like that...I won't be like that. As quitting smoking, my training, and everything else is a sort of ongoing evolution; I will grow and become more than I am. Just don't waste the time you have, make the most of every moment you have, especially with her.

See that's the whole point, the ticket to sucess. Be yourself, be aware, be free. If you are self actualized and actively pursue your own rational self interest you will by Darwins law if nothing else attract your lover ever more so. Someday may never arrive; do it now. Your dreams, happiness, and success await you.